Everything's messed up, but everything's alright

you were my sweetest mistake
my favorite downfall
the sweet smelling emotional suicide
the best way to break my heart

but will i ever mention you?
when i talk about the people who were dear to me
i loved you, but that was a long time ago
before i went to bed and went to sleep
to dream and pretend i wasn't hurt
by the words i couldn't get out of my head
you were my greatest downfall
the biggest mistake i was ever glad to make
the only thing upon which i could break

will i wake to see the light
will i find that it's still night
will i cry when i remember what happened
do i have any reason to cry at all
do you?
the stars are brighter than i ever knew they were
burning through the sky
the moon is a pale imitation of a heart
illuminating the lonely road i'm on

i guess it was the same one all along

Da na na na

somedays i don't feel like dancing
those days i just smile and try to stay in time
i cannot believe them when they say i'll be okay
someone i trusted in tells me that it'll come out okay
okay, okay, okay, i've had enough with okay
i'm not feeling okay, i don't want it to be okay
just forget it. i don't care about it
i don't even know what the "it" we're talking about is
but i'm willing to bet i don't care

i just lost a bet
because i do care
i care about all the children growing up in broken homes
i care about all the withered trees without any water
about the fish in the sea
the birds in the sky
and you and i and myself and why do you wear sweaters no matter the weather?
she's a girl from the wrong side of the train tracks
growing up inbetween the huge homes and rich girls
who couldn't say they love you because they don't really care

Poets don't know it's all a game...

have you had dreams you'd care to forget?
i've had hallucinations that make me feel like-
probably because I'm afraid of the dark
and afraid of being alone
and afraid of damn near anything
like the silhouette in the doorway
that i can't quite make out
maybe that's a dream too (i hope)

you get used to the nightmares after a while
well, of course you would, they're happening to me
anyway, it's a lifetime guarantee
that i don't really know and probably won't find
exactly what i've always wanted

give me something that i need
satisfaction or at least something that won't bleed
kiss me right where it hurts
devastating the only hope that i was using
the hope that i could teach myself not to feel
to never love, hate, cry or laugh for any reason
truely. i guess i was lost. without a warning sound

I'm so cool, it's like my heart's frozen.

i'm sitting here drafting a new version of my heart
because my love emailed me a letterbomb and blew the old one all apart
i'm still tripping over broken bits and memories
when i toss them in the furnace i get bloodstains on my hands
maybe i'm supposed to be missing you
maybe i'm supposed to be a lot of things
like fidelity and honesty
and chivalry and love
and love
and love

i don't know how to tell you that i wished we were friends
or at least lovers
back-seat-kissers
(maybe this is a joke)
(maybe i don't care that this isn't something to joke about)
i've never been able to stop laughing
i made a joke about 9/11 after it happened
i was unused to tragedy
i've wised up good now
and am on close terms with a sense of doom
and hugs that bleed all over your clothes
and i've finally figured out that friends you can count on
and lovers you can count on to stab you in the back